(Written 14th March)
OK, it’s now Passion Sunday, we’re entering the last two weeks of Lent. In our churches the crosses have been veiled in purple. I’m finally ready to try a day in black. Poncho is back in the cupboard, I’m not even wearing any blue. This feels very strange, and very uncomfortable (although strangely, 25 years ago, I would have been more than happy to wear all black.)
I’m surprised at how hard I’m still finding it to give up the pink – I thought I would have got used to it by now. I’m also surprised at how hard I’m finding it to actually get to the point of wearing just black. It feels very odd.
One of the things I have realised is that pink really is an expression of who I am at the moment. It does feel like it’s still a good colour, and it does feel congruent with who I am on the inside. Wearing pink I think does reflect something of who I am, of my optimism and cheerfulness. The combination of pink and my dog collar I think does speak something of my informality & approachability, which I think reflects my nature and my approach to being a priest.
However, I feel that I may have started to let go a little of my obsessiveness about pink, and hopefully may be a little more open to other colours – both me wearing them; but also to encountering aspects of God in other colours. Seeing the gorgeous nearly 3 year old Katie the other day, with her love of rainbows, helps me to remember more of the wonderful colours that there are all around us. I’m curious now to find out what happens to me come Easter… how much pink will I reclaim, and will I allow room for other colours? I’m not quite sure… part of me wants to just put back on all the pink that’s been lingering in my wardrobe…
A couple of weeks left to go now… I think I will spend a few more days in black, and see what happens.